“14 things you would hear when you catch her cheating”

                      

1. “Baby I’m sorry”
It’s true that most women hate to be at the receiving end when it comes to accepting faults. Once a lady is caught cheating she will be the first to tender her apology. Even when they know the apology at that moment is irrelevant. (Would she be if she wasn’t caught? No bro.)

2. “It wasn’t me, I swear.”
After an attempt to apologise, some women when caught cheating will out-rightly deny their actions, even when you have photo proof. Even if you walked in on them in the act, they could even say you were hallucinating. Some of them are related to one minister like that wey him name start with “L
.”

3. “It is the work of the devil”
It is always the devil, the poor dude has really suffered. Their godmother Eve don set the pace so na follow them dey follow so.

4. “I don’t know what came over me.”
Very common! They try to hide under the pretence of “I don’t know what came over me”. The question is, were they possessed or hypnotised?

5. “He is my uncle.”
Zaga that! Say hello to her long lost relative after that mehn. Note, you’re prolly her cousin (or “balogun the electrician”) to one of her suitors, too, you know. #WehDonMa

6. “He is just a friend.”
Lol, una wan be enemies before?! Hehehe as if we were born and brought up with “BOO” written on my foreheads na. We were never “friends” before or na BoyEnemy I be, not boyfriend. OloriBOOruku somebody.

7. “It is not what it looks like.”
Sure, na chinese film and I came in without buying movie ticket. Lol this is the silliest of them all mehn. It even sounds stupid when I hear it in movies.

8. “I don’t even know him.”
Oooshey! Mama the mama!

9. “It was an accident.”
Along Lagos-Ibadan expressway perhaps. How many casualties were involved dear? Hope no lives were lost?

10. “He forced me.”
Yes. A man who can force a lady from her papa house reach him house through electronic wave, force am into him room, force her leg open and then force himself in deserves a place Guinness Book of Record.

11. “It is your fault; you were not there for me.”
Really? But the other guy was always there for you; before, during and after the relationship? You no even complain? E sa nu mi ooo… Just say you want to kponse and stop littering our ears with lie jare.

12. “I still love you, he is nobody to me.”
Tales by moonlight.

13. “Don’t you trust me?”
I trust you, I swear down, I trust you die.

14. “Please give me another chance”
Like I should give you another bullet to shoot at me again after missing the first time? Do we look like masochists?

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